Red Balloon

We had movie night tonight.  We do that randomly - no specific set night for movie night or game night - just whenever Spencer thinks to ask for one.  Tonight, we watched the Red Balloon, which is a classic from 1956.  I wouldn't have thought of this one as being appropriate or interesting for his age, but he was enthralled.  I read the suggestion in a parenting list online (sorry, can't find the link - maybe on parenting.com or babble.com?).  Watching a nearly wordless movie together, in which the only words are in (subtitled) French, was a really nice experience.  We talked about what was happening, and I prepped him for the idea that all balloons pop someday.  Movie night can easily become "Mommy and Daddy enjoy computer time while Spencer zones out to a show next to us on the couch" night, and that is a lot less family friendly.  So this was really nice, and I would recommend it.

When trying to choose movies for our family, we often rely on www.commonsensemedia.org .  This time, Red Balloon was rated for 7-year-olds, and it honestly might be boring for older kids, but for younger kids who might find the idea of a sentient balloon to be fun, or the idea of hide-and-seek with a balloon to be interesting, it was great.  I'd recommend watching it with some pain au chocolat, since the little boy eats one during the show.  All in all, a really nice time. 

We have had a difficult time lately.  Spence has been exploring some new territory, some of which has been frustrating for me.  We have welcomed our new baby boy to the household.  And I have discovered that I am truly battling postpartum depression, and I have not been handling it very well.  My most effective tool lately has been to act As If, and when I start to feel myself getting ready to boil over with rage, I can hear a little voice in my head hollering, "as if! as if! make good choices!"  Which is what I tell my son all the time - are the choices that you are making bringing you happiness? 

As If means act as though things are already fantastic.  Act as if my son is the most delightful boy I have ever gotten to spend time with.  Act as if I am deeply in love with my adoring husband.  Act as if I have had enough sleep.  Act as if I am not depressed and in fact feel wonderful about myself.  Act as if I am a beautiful woman who has already achieved my weight loss and fitness goals.  It works astoundingly well.  I am not aspiring to all of those things; they are already here.  Life is wonderful!  Etc.  And suddenly, I cannot yell at my son - I would never talk to the most delightful child ever like that.  And it is not a battle over what delicious but not great snack to have - at my tiniest, I never thought of not snacking on fruits and veggies - at least not if I wanted to stay thin.  When I was physically fit, it was nothing to go for a walk, or a hike, or whatever else people wanted to do - it was fun, instead of a big ordeal.  As if is powerful stuff.